Sunday, 21 September 2014

A Hampshire party gig

I'm sorry I couldn't write yesterday. I had a big gig to do, which was a very exciting (if slightly nerve-wracking!) prospect. It was thrilling for me actually, as I hadn't sung 'properly' for several months, and I had been getting over one of those change-of-season colds that seem to get people at this time of year so my voice was a little fragile. 

The band that I was performing with were brilliant - full of energy, musically spot on and great fun - and the venue for the party was simply stunning. Even the rain held off, so everybody had a whale of a time!

I was nervous. Gosh, I was nervous! I didn't manage much dinner, even though it was a very tasty steak and chips, and I was shaking significantly before I started the first song, but it all went with a bang, and people were showing their magnificent dancing skills on the dance floor..

I have always had issues with anxiety, and I had two different types appear over the last couple of days;  the first being the rush of adrenaline before the gig, and the other being the fear that grips me sometimes when I have to take the Tube across London. I am the person that grips the handrail of the escalator with white knuckles and remains frozen to the spot until they reach the platform; the person that flushes red and gets far too hot on the packed train, even if it's a mild day; the person that has to take deep breaths, and talk to themselves really quietly to keep an aura of calm. I have unfortunately had a couple of panic attacks whilst on escalators and on Tube platforms in the past, and it's hard to dismiss those feelings of dread and panic when I step onto an escalator, especially the ones that appear to be taking you down into the centre of the earth. Covent Garden, I'm talking about you.

However, I prevailed, and made it onto a train home today, really happy with last night's performance and in time to watch the first episode of the new series of Downton Abbey with a glass of wine. Super.

What do you do to relieve tension and anxiety? I'd love to know.

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